Maybe I’m meant to be a giver, as that seems to motivate me–to give time, listening, energy and money to others.  I’m being mentored to sit and give to myself, which i find difficult, tiring and even boring.  I wonder why that is.

I give to others who may be using me.  I feel taken for granted some times.  I say “no” more often too.  I practice balance as best i can–imperfect at best–normal human I guess.

Today I have a task, so i feel a purpose.  It is extremely short sighted, office politics spurs me on to be noticed and organize a project.  i notice and appreciate any motivation these days.

Now off to wash, despite my inner argument to pass on a shower.  I feel like a cat that is forced to be dunked in a lake each day–I growl deep in my throat and threaten to slice the hand that washes me. 

i lean back into the Hands of the Dear One, as She giggles at my restless irritable self!