Being at a crossroads, I lie awake wondering about the possibilities.  Will I be there?  What will that be like?  How will I get there and how long?  What will happen to this car?  What will I get next and how will I afford it?

I return to chanting.  I set it aside and fold my hands to meditate.  And the brain chatter ambushes me again and again.  Training the monkey mind is a life-long practice.

Opening my eyes to listen, the bare stretching tree outside my window instantly reveals the enlightenment of nature.  Thousands of tiny branches reaching out smaller and smaller, yet still in the winter cold.  Beneath the icy earth there is a mirroring spreading root system of thousands of tiny end points.  This whole entity is complete, whole, everywhere and present.

Ahhhh today, I watch and listen to the heart in the trunk of my body.  I let the endless branches reach out into the air and fade.  My mind can wander and I am here and now at the same time.  If my human life is not a paradox, I’m not doing it right.