If I’m feeling entitled, a frustrated victim, or a suffering martyr, I’m vacillating back and forth as if in a debating society.  The two sides of my brain keep arguing and arguing: “But it should be this way–the right way!”  “But you are not entitled to that right, as you are hopelessly wrong.”  “I have needs!”  “But no one is required to fulfill those needs.”  And back and forth endlessly sniping at each other.

I don’t feel bewildered, but as the original word meant, I do feel like I’m suddenly lost in the wild.  Standing at what seems to be a dead end in the path, thick twisted vines and solid thick branches in my face, with only a pair of tiny bird-engraved embroidery scissors in my hand for a tool.

What if that was a directive: be in the wild.  Maybe we volunteered for this crazy journey just as in a game, to be in a spot where we have no answers.  The past is no longer a precedent that helps with the future.  The landscape has completely changed and I didn’t get the guidebook for this geography.  Time for the heart and brain to work together for wisdom.

Perhaps today I will let the brain rest from frantic rationalizations on either side and let the heart feel its way along the path.  The shadow of doubt is truly The Serene One reaching out for me.  No matter what is on the path, holding Her tender and constant hand soothes my heart, body and mind.