Rather than trusting the part of me that whines about the doldrums and harps on the mistakes, I want to relish the good things.  I want to be hypnotized by the memories of fun, enticed by dreams of accomplishment.  But the default always seems to be dull trudging.

What’s a human to do? 

Just the practice of knowing that it is a hallucination, all bad, and reminding the hungry horse of a heart to face the hay, the sustenance of comfort that the inner pasture of peace provides.  there can be years of arguments that the good too is an illusion, but I am convinced that it is a more pleasant choice.

So today, amid feelings of abandonment, trudging, uselessness, I choose the grandeur of a desert canyon in the dawn coral sun.  I claim the brilliant symphony of the pre-dawn birds from the forest as I sit in a field overlooking the lake and the mountains. 

And I wrap loving arms around me, hear Her soft singing as She rocks me in the lullaby of her love.