Here I am again trapped with the voices that want me to eat, drink and imbibe with substances that don’t freaking work in my body.  GEEZ.  Carbos stuff me up, my soda pop drink of choice is filled with crap that poisons my body and the argument is endless!

Let’s eat.
I don’t want to eat, I’ll just get tired.
for chrissakes we need fuel.
don’t care, wanna stay frosty.
frosty?!?!  You mean frosted?!
whatever.
we need fuel.
have caffeine–it will kill the urge

it’s late, let’s have a snack.
it will keep us up and clog us up.
I don’t care, I want something sweet
you’ll be sorry
I don’t care.
asshole.
jerk.

And then I eat more than not, and sit in the bed with that little hack trying to clear my chest of mucous.  (Sorry, this is not quite an inspiring morning meditation.)  But I have to admit and honor that essential human voice or I cannot tally the votes that motivates change.

So sometimes I eat, weep, get snotty, cranky and out of balance with the human being–being human.  Since faith and fear can always be in the same place for me–they HAVE to coexist, I can also stop for a moment, close my eyes, breathe deep into the center of every cell and know that I am that I am.

Breathing in, I claim the One.  Breathing out, I honor the little one.  Breathing in, I own the Divine inside, breathing out, I play this dear, exciting, hysterical, beautiful human game.