There’s a couple boxes of paint and caustic liquids that have to be brought to the hazardous waste dump. Apparently these days you have to make an appointment to dispose of them.
Hello, I’d like to make an appointment to bring you my hazardous waste. Yes, thank you. This is what I’d like to drop off:
* overflowing cans of regret that I could have done better
* a bottle of deepening despair of being unemployed
* a small box of anger that I’m not taken care of more diligently–by anyone
* a package of stupidity filled with the thought I’d be “fixed” and “spiritual” by now
* confusion in a container contaminating my days
* sheets and cardboard covered with flailing splattered irritation
In exchange, there should be a “beneficial provision” allotment. I’d take with me:
* constant gratitude of the here and now
* clearer perception to see the love around me
* energetic desire for exercise
* voracious hunger for good food
* easy release of everything that does not serve me
* massive dose of serenity allowing me to listen with generosity
and
A soft cloak of constant contact with the velveteen embrace of the Natural Universe who leans lovingly into my neck, whispering and giggling sweet nothings in my ear.